The following 15-minute reading of J R Miller’s work provides much information about communicating with others, Christian and non-Christian.
Miller’s insights and instruction is scriptural and important reminder of how Christ would have us love others.
Video Highlights [bracketed statements, emboldening and underscoring are mine]:
- Because of our own faults, we should be charitable in judging others
- What is the meaning of Jesus’ words, do not judge or you too will be judged?
- We cannot help forming opinions about the actions of others
- The holier, more Christ-like we grow, the keener will be our moral judgments
- We are not expected to close our eyes and to be blind to men’s sins
- What then, do our Lord’s words mean?
- We are not to look for the worst in others; nor to view them through the lenses of prejudice…
- We are not to think that men are answerable to us
- Nothing is said of speaking good of others [must see their actions… to do so]
- Judging, is putting oneself in God’s place, He is the one Judge with whom every soul has to deal
- James 4:12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?
- We do not have sufficient knowledge of others to judge them fairly, only God does
- 1 Corinthians 4:5 Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.
- [God can see the MOTIVES of everyone’s heart and judge rightly]
- Errors in acting and thinking derive from upbringing, education, experiences, injuries… of which we cannot know
- There are hurts in character, woundings of the soul which it would be wrong to condemn, as they are the inheritance of other’s wrong doing
- If we knew the causes of another’s distorted conduct, then, we would more likely have pity and patience instead of judgment
- If we knew what burdens others carry, we would better understand why they seem, for example, so crushed in spirit
- We typically are able to see the good in others at their funerals, and stop our criticizing and have more reverence for their lives
- Should we not practice such things with others while they live?
- If we knew all their sorrows, struggles, fears, and hopes, instead of just a few fragments about them, then we would likely be ashamed of ourselves for misjudging, or unjustly judging them
- [Several examples emphasize the significance of the points above and illustrating the ‘beams’ in our own eyes…]
- Qualities in ourselves that prohibit us from judging others fairly:
- Envy: it dims the beauty in others and exaggerates their faults; thus does this quality distort our vision / perceptions
- Our selfishness, in other forms [than envy] makes our judgments unkind
- Lack of experience in the struggles of another makes one incapable of sympathy…
- ANOTHER REASON WHY WE SHOULDN’T JUDGE OTHERS IS THAT OUR TRUE DUTY WITH THEM IS TO HELP THEM RISE OUT OF THEIR FAULTS
- Nagging, scolding, faultfinding… never made another more godly or cured him
- We are often told that one of the finest qualities in a true friend is that he will lovingly tell us our true faults; yet not many of us have sufficient grace to welcome even this
- A mother may tell her own children their faults if she does it lovingly, without impatience / anger
- A teacher may do the same, if done in genuine concern his student’s improvement
- In ordinary friendship, such communications about another’s faults could end that relationship
- It is often better to model the opposite behavior for them to see instead of directly confronting faults
- Our Lord often provided good examples for His disciples, rather than criticizing
- He was patient with their dullness as scholars, and never wearied of repeating lessons for their benefit
- He did not keep telling them of the blemishes He saw in them as a means of growing their faith
- His love enabled Him to see the sincerity in their motives to do right
- His gentleness and patience helped them towards a holier life
- Censoriousness never makes anyone better
- Only gentleness will produce gentleness
- Only love will cure infirmities of disposition
- As a rule, faultfinding is exercised by any but a loving spirit
- Faultfinders seem to delight in having found something unbeautiful in another, swooping down on them like a bird of prey on roadkill
- Any fault in another should be tenderly dealt with in love and in private
- We should train ourselves, therefore, to see the good and not the evil, speaking approving words of what is beautiful in them
- We should seek to heal with the true affections of gentleness and love the things which are not what they should be
I learned via thousands of interactions with the juvenile offenders with whom I worked for over two decades, that my own never-revealed thoughts about them were somehow telegraphed via my words and body language. Such things seem to be what was being emphasized above.
That is, PRAYERS and kind / loving thoughts that give others the benefit of the doubt, would seemingly facilitate us in more graciously communicating with them and having our communications received….
I am grateful to have been reminded of that former realization which I did employ in my relationship building with those youth. I have had great difficulty extending to adult Christians that kind of charitable thinking. I guess that I have been expecting them to be more Christ-like with me as I struggle; not acknowledging that they also have their own struggles…, as stated by J R Miller above.
The following narrative accompanied the above video at YouTube: Christian Sermons and Audio Books
[Two other sites where J R Miller’s works can be heard are at the end of this post.]
A large video collection of classic hymns, contemporary Praise and Worship songs, and the works (audio books, devotional readings, and sermons) of men greatly used of God, such as: Charles Spurgeon, Jonathan Edwards, A.W. Tozer, A.W. Pink, John Owen, Oswald Chambers, Andrew Murray, E.M. Bounds, John Bunyan, George Whitefield, and many more, covering topics on many aspects of the Christian life. May your time spent here be blessed.
J R Miller playlist from the playlist:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2085C7193D4C2AAE
Matthew 7:1 “Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?”
James Russell Miller was born on March 20, 1840 at Frankfort Springs, Pennsylvania and died on July 2, 1912. Besides authoring over 80 books, booklets, and pamphlets, Dr. J.R. Miller was the Editorial Superintendent of the Presbyterian Board of Publication and a very active pastor in a succession of churches.
The crucible of J.R. Miller’s education was his service with the United States Christian Commission, an agency set up to minister to the troops, during the civil war. When the war ended Miller completed his theological studies and was ordained and installed on September 11, 1867. On June 22, 1870, when he was thirty, he married Miss Louise E. King.
The end of life on earth came without warning on the afternoon of July 2, 1912. JR’s wife, Louise Miller, and their only daughter, Mary Wanamaker Miller (Mrs. W.B. Mount), were present, but it was impossible to summon the sons — William King Miller and Russell King Miller. One moment Dr. Miller seemed to be resting quietly; the next he was at rest.
JR Miller DD was one of the best selling Christian authors of his era. Rev. Miller’s books had a total circulation of over two million copies during his lifetime and in 1911 the Presbyterian Board of Publication, under his direction, published over 66 million copies of its periodicals.
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OTHER SITES FOR THE WORKS OF J R MILLER:
J R Miller messages from Grace Audio Treasures at Sermon Audio:
J R Miller sermons, books… at Grace Gems:
https://gracegems.org/Miller/BOOKS.htm
Featured Image from Wikipedia